First Grade Match Report Vs Gosford @ The Sharkpool Saturday 25th May 2013

Well after the euphoria of beating the Filth at the Haven it was another big game with the Sharks hosting Gosford at the Sharkpool

With 2nds and 3rds winning easily and the Colts defeating Warnervale at Warnervale things were looking good for a clean sweep at home.

Constant internet harrassment of the selection panel by Kellie Davies saw husband Josh restored to the top grade wearing no 14.

As we said last week dinner suit...fight your own battles !

An early penalty to Speedy saw us lead 3-0 well into the first half.

However injuries to new signing Aaron Bolte and 5/8 Mitch Graham saw our attacking raids disrupted with both replaced early. Aaron was last seen being helped to his car by JT both pursued by Aaron's somewhat pissed off wife !

Dropped balls saw a number of tries go begging along with one or 2 strange refereeing decisions causing us to lose our way somewhat.

Just before half time some slack defence saw Gosford cross under the posts and make it 10-3. A late penalty by Speedy as the half time hooter sounded saw us go to lemons at 10-6 down.

Then from the kick off a dropped ball saw Gosford go blind and score suddenly its 17-6. They did it again and again and after 10 minutes we were down 29-6 ! A bridge too far perhaps ?

More injuries saw Josh Meadham come off , replaced by 7 times runner up for pest of the year Sam Fortey. With the ageing Justin Staben also called on to direct play the Sharks started a late comeback.

Consistent little froggie and IPL superstar Julian Spagbowler kept up his good form with a try near the post duly converted by Speedie and then Speedie showed why he is called that by burning the Gosford outside backs to run in and score under the posts.

His conversion saw us back to 29-20 with 5 minutes to go. The Fuz succumbed to cramp and was replaced by veteran Brooklan Morgan sporting his new MR T haircut.

With our new prop Rick suffering a suspected broken wrist and a host of others getting injured a total of 8 players were replaced during the game.The call even went out to "Get Wadey Ready" but alas we had also run out of 4xxxx jerseys ( in fact we never had one in the kit but the call did make him feel good ! )

But the boys kept going at Gosford with Brooklan Morgan crossing under the posts in the shadow of full time. Speedie’s conversion saw the final score 29-27 and left us thinking what might have been !

Oatie was a tower of strength and the Geeman was solid in the middle. Speedie scored 17 of our points with a try , 3 conversions and 2 penalty goals.

Next week it is Kariong at home…another hard encounter that will require 100 % commitment both at training and on the day

So get to training and dont leave it to your mates


Cheers Boys

Scores
Tries 1x J.Spagbowler ,1x Brookie , 1 x Speedie

Conversions 3 x Speedie

Penalties 2 x Speedie

Best & Fairest
3 Oatie
2 Geeman
1 Brubby

Players Player Julian Spagbowler

First Grade Match Report Vs The Blue Filth @ The Haven Saturday 18th May 2013

Score Avoca Sharks 20 Blue Filth 6

What a day…the sun was shining the crowd on the hill was growing and yet the Under 19's, 3rds and 2nds had all been put to the sword by the Blue Filth.

With the Trojan supporters baying for blood our boys were lead out by Sherry who was playing his 100th first grade game. In the dressing room Sherry pledged not to take a backward step and was fired up to put the Blue Filth away.

Media slut Stewart Jenkins in his pre-game speech dug deep into the archives and with a mixture of the Gettysburg address sprinkled with the last words of the men from Sparta one could tell our boys were focused.

We were missing captain Stretch and with Conan still ruled out due to a wardrobe malfunction Galloping Green new boy Tim Maxwell had his first run on start for the Sharks.

The earlier exchanges were brutal with the Filth’s Uncle Fester impersonator at no 8 taking an early dislike to Doris. The Geeman set him straight with some withering comments including “ your double chin wobbles when you get angry”.

An early Speedy penalty saw us 3-0 deep into the first half and then it happened…a movement started way back in our half and after some great work from Speedy and many others in support the last being Josh Meadham who went in under the Trojan posts for what would have to be the try of the year (so far) was scored under the Trojans posts. Speedy converted and we went into half time leading 10-0. Amazing how quite the people in blue became after we scored that try !

The second half saw a number of breakaways and resolute defence before AJ toed the ball , recovered and set sail for the line only to be run down just near the white line. The Sharks in support showed much composure to take the next ruck and with the ball spread wide Cheers Boys was ringing out on BARRIES HILL as the Geeman dived over for the 5 pointer. Speedy missed the conversion and it was back to some more defence before Speedy kicked through and recovered to score a fine individual 5 pointer !

The final score as 20 – 6 with the Filth landing 2 penalty goals but unable to penetrate our defence.

A great result with a fine ending when the team were able to stand on a Trojan’s head and sing “Cheers Boys”.

Brub had another great game and was a stand out winner of the players player award. Evergreen Oatie was a tower of strength in the tight stuff finishing with a cut and nursing a very battered Doris. Due to the damage Doris was not allowed out to dance with Fuz on Saturday night.

New boy Tim Maxwell was impressive whilst Jimmy at inside centre caused some problems for the Trojan runners. A cameo from Tom Murphy saw the boys lift after Tommy’s big hit. Josh Meadham after being called on to fill in at 7 tried hard and then moved back into the hooking role late in the second half. A gusty effort along with Sherry , Smithy and Troy saw our scrum hold its own. Shane Lloyd took a heavy knock late in the game and hopefully he will be ok

Next week it Gosford at home a top of the table clash at the Sharkpool

Best & Fairest
3 Emile Thomas
2 Tim Maxwell
1 Julian Bacigalupo

Scorers
Tries 1 each to Josh , Speedy and Geeman
Conversions 1x Speedy
Penalties 1 x Speedy

Match Report First Grade Vs Ourimbah Saturday 11th May 2013 @ The Sharkpool

Score Avoca 16 Ourimbah 8

Scorers
Tries 1 x Brubby
Conversions 1 x Speedy
Penalty Goals 3 x Speedy


Best & Fairest
3 Mitch Graham
2 Julian Bacigalupo
1 Everyone in the forward 8… go you good things

Players Player Julian Bacigalupo

This was billed as a top of the table clash with Coach Jenkins claiming Ourimbah were the bench mark for 2013. Although Ourimbah had been beaten by Gosford Jenkins on weekly sports show talked up the Razorbacks as tough opponents. Once again he was right and our job was made all that harder with late pull outs by Sherry & Jimmy due to illness and injury.

JD retained his position at full back despite many claiming his wife had put undue pressure on Jenkins to retain him. Fight your own battles JD !

Speedy went to outside centre with the evergreen and referee lover David Maryska coming onto the wing.

An early injury to starting prop Buncie Mitchell saw the resurrection of the late but great Hoani Rimene who came on to steady the scrum and provide many ball running opportunities in midfield. Despite taking on a major role in the Tod Wadey campaign H’s contribution to the game was well received. Immediately after the game H was seen in earnest discussions with backs coach and brother in law Fuz. Rumour has it they were discussing H’s development of the goose step and his desire to play second five !

Captain Stretch led from the front and despite being asked by the referee to go rest his tonsils for 10 minutes he was dominant in all plays. Oatie once again provided the go forward when the tough stuff needed to be done

All the talk was about how strong Mitch Graham was in repelling Ourimbah attackers.

He was seen smashing into tackles and running hard and straight up the middle. Rumour has it that as he went in for the first hit he was heard to shout “I am not a f&&&&ing poodle” !

Pat Jenkins was injured early which saw the introduction of ex Randwick player Tim Maxwell to the game.

Would be Gaulist Julian Baicalupo continued his fine form with a try whilst making himself a pest around the scrum base.

Some forwards found his constant whistling of the Marsellie somewhat distracting. But as Brubby confided to this scribe “ You need to try everything not only in football !”

In all the forwards toughened up bringing praise from all the Avoca supporters.

Speedy compiled a personal 11 points and showed his kicking game was back on song

A great win for the club !

Next week it is the filth at The Haven something we all look forward to

See you there

Team Management


Disclaimer from the Editor
This report is compiled from the personal diaries of a number of players as well as from spectator input given that our usual sports correspondent Arse Tu Wide was interstate over the weekend on secondment to the Tod Wadey < A Beacon of Light> Presidential Campaign.. Accordingly whatever is said about Brubby, Mitch or any of the other fairy breads is purely the words of either the general public , spectators or disgruntled referees. Children under 15 should read this report in the company of an adult

First Grade Match report vs Woy Woy @ Woy Woy Saturday 4th May 2013

Controversy clouded the day even before the kick off with Coach Jenkins drawing a line in the sand on Thursday when he dropped SUPER STAR Pretty Boy Jimmy Latham for not coming to training.

Despite desperate pleas from Jimmy’s mum Jenkins was adamant. No train No Play with no concessions for anyone.

A tearful Jimmy at Friday’s captain’s run declared that the reason he missed training was because he was rostered on at the Mann Street Soup Kitchen where he spent Thursday night serving minestrone soup to the needy.

Declaring Jenkins to be heartless and unforgiving Jimmy was heard to say that Jenkins was ”dead to me !”
Despite playing a starring role in the 2nd grade 95-0 demolition of Woy Woy Latham did not put the boots on for the first grade bench.

However a timely intervention by Chin Tu Fat’s Chinese facilitator and hostage negotiator saw Latham and Jenkins make up on the first grade bench prior to Latham being subbed into first grade.. Jenkins denies that part of the reconciliation consideration was to allow Jimmy to deliver minestrone soup to the outlying soup kitchens of the Gosford Shire.

The sight of 2 men kissing and hugging on the bench upset some of the supporters but for all the Kiwis in the club it apparently is a common occurrence now the laws have changed over the ditch.

And now to the game … the first half saw the Sharks struggle to execute but with the wind at their backs the tries came thick and fast straight from the kickoff in the second half.

Pistol Pete Mitchell latched onto some wide passes to score out wide a few times and Emile shattered his 100 % goal kicking average with a missed shocker from in front. David Riley was strong on the left wing until an untimely accident saw him shatter his arm. Due the nature of that accident the referee called time with the Sharks running out winners 61-3 with 11 tries being scored but only 3 conversions . Lets hope Dave is up and about real soon and back with the Sharks.
Best on field was Pat Jenkins who was every where with solid support from Oatie and Sherry.
3 Pat Jenkins
2 Emile Thomas
1 Luke Sheridan

Players player shared between Oatie & Sherry

Cheers Boys

Remember next week the big one against Ourimabh and then we get to bash the Blue Filth at their home ground

Oh Joy

Cheers Boys